Our neighbour has moved out. The house next door is vacant again. I have forgotten how many generations there have been, probably more than four. Looking out through our window to the emptied backyard nearby, I sense the loneliness. People come and go fulfilling their assigned tasks on earth contrasting our pause in this dimension. Without a trace, it has come to the ninth year since we have settled here.
We did have a seachange eight years ago but after then, I seem to be content with the present and avoid risks. I asked Wing if we were too cowardly for changes anymore or this day hadn't come yet. Or ... am I too old for new challenges?
Yeah, perhaps age is a problem. I had decisively moved towards my dreams with no worries as if life itself would take care of me in its own course. But now, I will only move my foot one step further unless I feel the concrete underneath is firm and stable. I do have my plans but I will only implement them when everything is secured. I don't know if it would be too late for another change to come. I just don't have the guts to face the uncertainty in this age of my life.
Many years ago, when I was struggling in the bustling dimension, the meaning of this day was a day with a special excuse for the people around me getting together to build up relationship. This personal day became one of the social occasions for them except that lip-service greetings to me were all around.
The meaning of this day to me is a measurement of my hanging around with pride of the experience accumulated yet vulnerable getting to understand the course of birth and death. I prefer this day to be calm and peace with minimum human contacts, just quiet enough for me to contemplate the past and the future. Now I'm grateful that I can spend this day in accordance with my wishes without caring to respond to other people's superficial kindness.
Tension is originated from connection and attachment between two parties. Letting go from a single side doesn't help much to resolve the problem. The resolution of it must be achieved by reducing expectations to each other from both sides.
Nevertheless, there is a tip for those tension makers who are thinking of demolishing tension only by themselves without involving the second party. In order to use this tip, you have to be sure:
1. You don't care how much your attachments mean to you
2. You can spoil a relationship anytime without a second thought
If you answer "yes" to both of the questions above, here is the tip for you:
1. Increase the tense power until the attachment and connection cannot hold anymore
2. The bonds will then be violently broken and in a fraction of a second, the tension will entirely vanish
3. As the bonds are broken, attachment and connection no longer exist
Here you go, there won't be any tension left, nor love and care.